Usually, when I post on Mondays, it’s about making all that household stuff fit into your life without taking it over…yet still getting it done. But sometimes, you have to stare the beast in the face for a long, hard minute, and say, “Piss off, I’m not dealing with you today.”
You know it, I know it, and the Laundry knows that there’s one simple truth in a domestic life. There will always be laundry. There will always be dishes, and the dust will never truly be gone. We do all we can to battle it, and we declare victory when it’s not piled higher than our heads, but the reality is that it’s a war of attrition. Eventually, the house wins.
Put down the matches. I’ve had that feeling, too, and lemme tellya, the brief satisfaction you’d get from burning that sucker to the ground will still leave you with a pile to clean up. And ash makes even more dust.
It’s about priorities. We all have them, and we all act on them. They might not be what we think they are. Look at what you spend your time actually doing and you’ll find your real priorities there. Not the ones you wrote down in the post-it note, or the ones you scrawled in that fancy notebook you’re supposed to carry around with you everywhere, but is in reality buried under a leftover, half-eaten kids meal and perhaps coated in dried-out ketchup…or gathering dust in a drawer of the desk you never quite sit at.
Where we fall down is in the setting of these priorities in stone. Of course, the family comes first. Of course, the house must be cleaned before the neighbors call in the health department or the corpses of dust bunnies shamble to unlife. Of course, the kids need clean underwear and pants that don’t stand up by themselves and dinner that’s not still in the frozen fishstick box.
You are allowed to shift your priorities. Priorities should not be set in stone, nor etched into flesh. Sometimes, the laundry can wait.
If you’re not consciously shifting your priorities at least part of the time, you’re going to find yourself shifting them unconsciously, and that has a lot greater of a chance of shifting them into a self-destructive direction. At some point, the same set of priorities will stop focusing your efforts and start draining them. Even in war zones, soldiers get R & R.
You can look at your schedule and pick an hour, a half-day, maybe two days a week, where your priorities focus on you or your writing or whatever you use for enjoyment that you just never get as much of a chance to do. Reset your priorities for that period of time and make it a point to focus on those altered priorities. Notice the difference when you shift back to the ol’ standards? Try this consistently for one month, and see whether or not your productivity, your life balance, and your attitude improve.
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She’s absolutely sure he’s not the marrying kind…
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